


Off the Grid, Kid

by noimrockandroll (orphan_account)



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: BAMF Angelica, Enemies to Lovers, F/F, Kidnapping, M/M, Pirates, Rivalry, Swearing, alex is both bark and bite, am i capable of writing a chapter with 1000+ words?, angelica is the leader of the treasure hunters, but idk how to incorporate theo into here, chapters come slowly, coming approximately in three years, i can't imagine her as a pirate, i think i will add theo/burr in the future, lots of plot holes, probably not, see you at the next update, short chapters everywhere, that tiny dude will square up any day, the jefferson family leads the pirates, thomas is a rich prick, treasure hunters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-26
Updated: 2018-06-09
Packaged: 2019-05-08 23:32:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14704776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/noimrockandroll
Summary: (ON HIATUS)In which Alex and his friends are treasure hunters who live on an island off the grid and Thomas, James, and Aaron are pirates.After an incident with the pirates that gets Alex in an extremely sticky situation, he needs a plan to break through it. But at the moment, he’s just going to keep annoying the hot prick of a pirate who keeps watch on him.





	1. Son of a Bitch Pirates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok i (unloyally) PROMISE that i will update hello 911 i've been assaulted but i've been working on this for a week and it's like...the best thing i've created in literal ages. enjoy! :P

“C’mon! Why don’t we use _my_ plan for once?” Alex protested, leaning his head on Eliza’s shoulder.

Eliza flicked the top of his head. “Angelica is our leader for a reason, Alex,” he grunted, feeling defeated. “Plus, remember what happened last time we carried out your plan?”

“I remember,” Alex said. “It wasn’t even that bad! For you, at least, Peggy and I were the ones who ended up nearly drowning.” He admitted multiple times it was a pretty flawed plan, but you live and you learn and Alex had most definitely learned from his experience. The rest of the group, however, found that unbelievable.

“That is why you're not the brains of this operation.” She sighed as Alex took his head off her shoulder, feigning offense.

Angelica cleared her throat. “The pirates are after this supposed treasure, too,” her eyes wandered over to the ship anchored far off. “They aren’t exactly quiet about their plans.” She visibly rolled her focused eyes.

“I say we start heading for it today,” John suggested. He blew a curly hair out of his face. Lafayette groaned in protest, flopping dramatically against John, half for the dramatic effect and half to royally annoy him.

He gazed up at John through half-lidded eyes. “My legs will fall off if we leave in the next hour,” he complained. Lafayette took the back of his hand and rested it on his forehead. “A man can never get his rest apparently.”

John crossed his arms and bitterly yet playfully shoved him off himself. “I said today, not right at this moment, you big baby,” 

Angelica nodded. “Three hours?”

Peggy bit her lip nervously and pointed at the ship. “I don’t believe we have three hours Angie unless you want to fall behind.” The pirates were beginning to take off. Alex could spot one on deck, looking at them with a shit-eating grin. Peggy was right - they better get going, now being preferable. Angelica cursed, cracking her knuckles in frustration.

“Son of a bitch!”

✽⁂✽

 _Those lazy ass pirates and their stupid ships,_ Alex thought as he jogged through the trees. _Can’t they afford to walk a little? Be just with us?_ The treasure hunters did have a boat, of course, they did, but the problem was that they parked a good ways away for some odd reason that none of them could exactly remember, but they can all peg it as Hercules’ fault (who protests otherwise but he absolutely knows he’s wrong).

Alex sighed in relief as the boat came into view. It was smaller than the pirate boat, a lot smaller in fact, but it was faster and if Eliza had gotten the math right and wasn’t just using her mad reassurance powers, they could pass the pirate ship. 

They climbed in, Hercules behind the wheel. “Y’all fastened in?” He asked, tapping his thick fingers on the side of the wheel.

Everyone nodded. “Good,” Hercules said before zooming forward, splashing water behind them and in the faces of few. 

The motor was _loud_. The ship ahead could most definitely hear them coming, which wasn’t a problem. Maybe it would intimidate them, alarm them even. Knowing these guys, Alex could say that some of them were absolute cowards.

Quickly, their boat drew dangerously close to the bigger one. Before they knew it, they were side by side. And there was land near. Dangerously near. It wasn’t where the map intended them to go and they needed to take a sharp turn now if they wanted to make it. Hercules was too busy exchanging rude gestures with a pirate to notice.

“Turn!” Alex shrieked before hearing the sound of metal against metal and the force of another. He turned back and saw an anchor dented into their boat. This did not stop them from violently, in one huge flash before all their eyes, collide with the sand on the island.

Hercules had been thrown forward by the force, as they were going particularly fast to outspeed their rivals. He groaned, flopped against his seat and clenched his eyes shut. He let out a hiss before passing out.

“ _Mon gentil géant!_ ” Lafayette exclaimed, scrambling over to his boyfriend. Everyone was in complete shock, eyes wide.

The pirates had stopped. Maria eyed the anchor in the back of their boat, examining the damage. “Well damn.” She muttered, running her fingers up and down the rusting metal. 

It was beginning to get dark and cool by the time most of their nerves had chilled. Hercules had woken up with a wet handkerchief against his forehead and a splitting headache and had been complaining ever since he opened his eyes. They snacked on fallen coconuts, lazily taking in the food.

Alex glared up at the unmoving, almost dead seeming pirate ship. They still hadn’t taken their goddamn anchor out of their boat. He eyed it with such suspicion. What were they playing at? He knew they were there. Waiting. Lurking.

“I’m not sleeping,” He announced as his tired friends began to curl up on whatever nearby comfortable part of the ground they could find. 

Eliza looked at him like he was a madman. “You do that. You’re way too suspicious and nerved about this whole situation, Alex.” There was a chorus of lazy, murmuring agreements.

And so he watched. He watched as the last of his friends fell into peaceful unconsciousness. It seemed like an appealing idea to Alex, but he knew at any moment, someone could come and do something. Anything.

He was right.

Alex knew this when a hand snaked around his neck and clamped over his mouth, muffling his screams of alarm and protest. Despite his hopeless flailing and kicking, the person did not let go. He heard a grunt and a whisper as he saw the figure of another man.

And of course Alex also knew when a cool, thin rod of metal collided against his head and he goes out cold in the stranger’s grip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _what do you mean i abuse italics_  
>  please consider giving kudos and comments because they boost my self-esteem and i would love to see what yall have to say about this


	2. Asshole Syndrome / Where in the World is A. Ham

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex hates pirates and traitors a great deal (who knew?) / The treasure hunters are confused due to Alex's disappearance but have confident guesses on who could be to blame.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> am i on a roll with this? yes.  
> is that going to continue? probably not.

What Alex did not expect to happen on this trip was to wake up in a small, wooden-walled room, tied to a chair. His arms were stuck behind his back, tied together. Even if they weren’t tied together, the sticky sweat formed would be enough to bound them together.

He blinked a few times to adjust to the lighting. Three men were watching him, almost like they were expecting at that very moment for him to awake. He growled at the familiar face of one. 

“Alexander.”

“Aaron Burr, sir.”

“How are you?” Burr is smirking. _What a fucking jerk_ , Alex thought, gritting his teeth. That was unlike Burr to do such a taunting thing like this with his “talk less, smile more” attitude.

“Well, sir, if my arms weren’t bound together I’m completely sure I would punch the shit out of you.” 

A tall, fine muscled man with poofy hair and a grin that basically had the words “I’m cocky” written all over it snorted unattractively. 

Feeling brave, Alex retorted, “And who do you think _you_ are, shithead?” The man rolled his eyes. His stupid, cocky grin grew into an even cockier smirk if that was possible.

“Why, I’m Thomas Jefferson,” The man drawled out. His obvious prick levels had expanded by a lot just with his Virginian accent. If it was possible to strangle him right now, Alex would never miss that opportunity. “I’m actually quite important, y’know? My family runs this ship. And who do you think _you_ are?”

“Why, I’m Alexander Hamilton,” Alex mocked his words. “I’m actually not quite important, y’know? So I would appreciate if you would please get over your asshole syndrome, untie me, and let me off this godforsaken ship.”

The third man who had been strangely silent the whole time coughed and simply said, “No.”

Alex sighed. “Coughing is a side effect of asshole syndrome,” he claimed. “All you have to do to be healed is _fucking free me._ ” He hissed in emphasis on the last part.

Burr opened his mouth to speak but he was cut off. “And don’t you dare tell me it isn’t real like the asshole traitor you are, sir.” Alex was not a very happy camper about seeing Burr again - his first friend, maybe even his enemy. He had a real bone to pick with him. Left the treasure hunters. Exposed their plans. Even brought some of their shared treasure with him.

“Snarky, aren’t ya?” Thomas purred, head resting in the palm of his hand, clearly amused. Alex was very, very tempted to embrace his inner llama and spit in his smug face but knew just well enough that that would get him in deeper shit than he already was in.

“Look,” Burr said, voice flat, “your group is nothing when they lose a member of the team. They will refuse to move on if I know them correctly.” Alex nodded slowly in understanding, hoping that this will urge him to his next point.

“Taking away you will weaken them. You have no idea how great, how massive, how utterly valuable this treasure is, Alexander. The prize will be in our hands soon enough.” 

Thomas spun around in a dumb swivel chair. His back ended up facing Alex, so he tilted his head back. “And if you’re a good boy, we’ll free you, ‘ight?”

“And if I’m not a ‘good boy’?” Alex is the one smirking now. Despite his efforts, Thomas is unbothered.

“We’ll see.”

✽⁂✽

The first thing Angelica noticed when she awoke was the quiet. All she could hear was the gentle waves and soft whispers. Besides her, only Hercules, Lafayette, and Maria were awake. After looking at all sleeping and awake friends, it finally hit her.

Alex was absent. 

Did he go to sleep elsewhere? Was he out scavenging for whatever?

She poked Lafayette, trying to keep collected. “Have you seen Alex this morning?” He frowned, trying to recall any memory of Alex that wasn’t from the night before. He shook his head.

“I’m afraid not, _mon amie_ , but I’m sure he isn’t too far from here.” 

She took another look at her surroundings and took a deep breath as she looked at their boat. The anchor was gone, just a nasty dent remained. This was not Angelica’s only concern though. Not only was the anchor gone, the whole ship was gone.

Assuming Alex had not gone to sleep, why didn’t he wake them up and warn them of this taking off? Perhaps he had gone to sleep after all because he would never let this slip past him. The only problem was that Angelica had no idea where his sleeping body could be.

She paced back and forth, feeling a bit sick to her stomach. Was she being overdramatic? Angelica herself could not tell, but she knew for sure that they were not leaving this island until the whereabouts of Alex were known.

The rest of the crew began to wake up one by one. After they all were finally awake, she brought the absence of both the ship and Alex to their attention.

John frowned. “It’s very plausible that the pirates could have taken Alex. Burr is on that ship after all, isn’t he? He knows us as a team.” 

Peggy snorted. “What would they want of a scrawny, loud-mouthed man like Alex?” After realizing what she said, she quickly added, “No offense to him!” 

“Like I said! As a team, we like to stay together and never leave a member behind. He’s trying to get to us.”

“But what if he isn’t?”

“No time for ‘but’s, Pegs! If it makes you feel any better, we could briefly check around the island. Considering the fact our boat is still here, I’d like to believe Alex didn’t take off swimming.”

Angelica swooped over to John and put a hand on his shoulder. “John’s right. We aren’t fools, are we? Where else could Alex had gone if he’s not here?” 

Peggy nodded and shrugged. “I guess so.” 

“Great, so we’re all at an agreement?” No one spoke up. “I’ll take that as a yes. Hercules, are you up for driving?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is pure neutral to me. i'm going to TRY and make the next chapter longer.  
> thank you so so so much for all the comments and kudos! i appreciate all of you angels so much, even if i just reply with an awkward thanks. <33


	3. They're Trying, Ok?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex is exhausted because a) Thomas is a dickhead, and b) Thomas is a dickhead / the treasure hunters try so hard but they don't succeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, on the last chapter's notes: i'm going to try to write a longer chapter owo
> 
> me: *writes a 740 word chapter that sucks*

Alex hadn’t slept since the night before the kidnapping unless you counted the tiny winks of sleep he got once a day, which lasted about thirty minutes before Thomas scared him awake (he still hadn’t been cured of asshole syndrome). It had seemed like ages ago he was free, though it had only been nearly a week.

How could he have gotten a good sleep though? He was being held hostage by pirates, something you would only read in a novel or see in a movie. Although it has now become Alex’s very strange reality. 

In all honesty, he was exhausted. He couldn’t wait until the fatigue makes him feel as brain dead as one can be, haha.

All he had to do was wait for his friends to come and save him from this hell. Wait for it. Something he usually never dared to do and will probably never dare to do again. 

Thomas sat by the door, running his hands through his curls. “How long do you think you’ll be kept here before we get bored and throw you overboard?” He joked, chuckling at himself.

“I think awhile if they have kept you for as long as they have.” The smirk that was wiped off Thomas’ face was enough to transport a full 24 hours of rest into Alex. 

“You clever rat.”

“Ah, so you admit I’m clever.” 

“Don’t get too cocky, Hamilton.”

It is silent for a few moments. Alex had no idea whether to relish it greatly or go insane. The silence is interrupted by a loud crash, yells, and the door opened by James frantically.

Thomas perked up in surprise and James supplied answers before Thomas even got to ask a single question. “Hamilton’s friends...plus some others...probably allies of theirs. Come!” There is another loud crash, which rattled the ship, nearly making Alex fall off the wooden chair he sat on.

“ _Motherfucker!_ " Thomas cursed, running after James, not bothering to shut the door. Alex can’t help but grin. His friends were going to rescue him after all. But that was no telling if they were successful or not.

✽⁂✽

“Laf, chill out with the cannons,” Maria complained, shoving him slightly.

“But they’re so fun! We don’t have them on our boat.”

Tench Tilghman pushed his way to the front, lips pressed into a firm line. “If you wanna get Hamilton back, it’d be wise of you to slow down on the cannons.”

Lafayette nodded and stepped back. Offended, Maria slapped his arm. “How come you listen to him and not me?” 

“He seems to know what he’s doing.”

“And I don’t?”

“God, shut the fuck up, the both of you! Tallmadge is up there finding out if Alexander is really on deck and possibly snatching him back,” Angelica commanded. “And don’t use the cannons so much yet, Laf. Remember that we don’t know if they really have him in their possession.” 

Both shrunk away from Angelica, exchanging childish glares. They watched as three men chase Benjamin Tallmadge off the ship, spitting and swearing in rage. He gives a thumbs up to Angelica, the agreed upon signal that Alex was in fact with the pirates, scrambling to the ladder on the side of the ship.

When Angelica nudged Lafayette, he grinned like he was a preschooler and his mother had just put a drawing of his on the fridge, and fired a cannonball towards some barrels on the side of the deck.

The blow was strong and wood blew into the ocean and dust threatened to enter the eyes of many. Benjamin, out of breath, staggered on board. “Hamilton...is there, as you could tell by the signal. He’s tied up. I was going to steal him back, but then, of course, I was caught red-handed.”

“We could ask for Alex in exchange for not destroying their ship and not going after the treasure,” Hercules suggested.

“Oh no, we’re definitely going after the treasure!” Peggy yelled at him from the edge of the treasure hunter boat. She was not seen, but she sure was loud.

Hercules sighed. “Ok, so in exchange for not destroying their ship.” Right when he finished his words, Lafayette aimed a cannonball at the crow’s nest and watched it tumble down.

Angelica winced as the men angrily yelled again. It was not surprising when some men began to climb down the edge of their ship to fight the attackers. “Technically, they brought this upon themselves,” John muttered, squeezing his fists.

As the men began to climb onto Washington’s ship, every single one of them realized that they were ultimately screwed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there WAS (key word: was) going to be another part of this chapter that thomas returns to alex and is like "lol hahaha your friends got their asses kicked and you're still captive! (:<" but then i reread it. then i reread it again. and it was so bad omg, the reason why this chapter took so long to come out was that i couldn't figure out how to wrap up that part so now it's scrapped. ok that's it for story time
> 
> also also also, i think it's a bit confusing but the treasure hunters are with a crew of kinda?pirates? lead by G-Wash on their ship, however Peggy and let's just imagine some of Wish-Washy's crew was with her on the treasure hunter boat, k? k.
> 
> consider giving kudos, comments (feedback? constructive criticism?), etc. etc. on this! i would appreciate it (:


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